Little Fortune: Lucky I'm Here

It’s September, and that means it’s Suicide Prevention Month. I can’t help but feel like there is no cheery way to say that, lol. And to be honest, that might be what was at the core of brainstorming Little Fortune, this year’s Qommunity campaign supporting the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. How do we get people to be more comfortable with something that is quite literally so uncomfy?

At the end of the day, I know it’s heavy. Even I don’t know where to start, and I am all too familiar with the subject, between my personal experience with suicidal ideation and losing a few loved ones. Like, as someone who talks a lot, I still struggle to talk about this.

When I think about my experiences with suicide and all of the ways it has touched my life, like a true Cancer, I'm toppled over by waves of emotion. There’s sadness, grief, regret… but lately, I would say since my friend Kristal passed away earlier this year, there’s been an additional wave.

Oddly enough, it kinda feels like a wave of... relief? I know. And that’s a new feeling for me, at least when it comes to how I have processed my interactions with suicide and untimely deaths in the past. After sitting with it, I realized that that wave of “relief” is really gratitude, and ultimately, a feeling of being very fortunate that I am alive today.

I can’t help but feel very lucky to be here. Because I don’t think the 26-year-old version of me who struggled the way I did could even fathom how creative, talented, and accountable I am, how successful I've been, and how much love and joy I’ve felt over the years. And it's not that life suddenly got better - but the small steps, reminders and hopes that, on their own, feel incremental have altogether added up to help create the version of me that's typing this at 2:19am.

The friends who let me crash at their place. The parties where I danced with a crush. The coworkers who bailed me out and made me laugh when I absolutely didn't expect them to. The therapist who let me be late. The crab cakes at Shell and Bones. The art I made and remade. The community that wouldn't allow me to disappear. The cat being cute in my driveway.

All the small things, Blink-182. 

So that’s what Little Fortune is. 

Inspired by the little fortunes we find in unexpected places (and oftentimes when we need them the most), this campaign is about community, creativity, and remembering that a little hope goes a long way. Through a series of events throughout the month, we’ll be fundraising for suicide prevention, holding space for our friends affected by suicide and giving people a chance to be in community with others who, like me, don’t always have the words.

We've already kicked off with Little Fortune: Coffee & Color last month at Spruce Coffee in New Haven.

Here’s what’s next on the line-up:

• A Little Stillness: Yoga & Sound Bath with Taylor and Ellyana
  • Sunday, September 13th, 12pm-1:30pm
  • NXTHVN, 169 Henry Street, New Haven, CT
  • $10+ suggested donation directly on our AFSP fundraising page. Comment “A Little Stillness.”
• Little Fortune: Coffee & Color (Part 2)
  • Thursday, September 17th, 7pm-9pm
  • Spruce Coffee, 952 State Street, New Haven, CT
  • $5+ suggested donation directly on our AFSP fundraising page. Comment “Coffee & Color”.
• Lucky, You’re Here with Nehway, Indigaux, Selector AR & DJ Multi
  • Sunday, September 20th, 3pm-7pm
  • Massaro Farms, 41 Ford Road, Woodbrige, CT
  • $15 Tickets Available Here
• A Little Fortune, Found: Poetry Workshop and Open Mic with Dyme Ellis of Punq Noire
  • Tuesday, September 22nd, 6pm-8pm
  • Bloom, 794 Edgewood Avenue, New Haven, CT 06515
  • $10+ suggested donation directly on our SFSP fundraising page. Comment “A Little Fortune, Found”.
• AFSP’s Out of Darkness Walk
  • Sunday, October 4th, 9:30am-12pm
  • Town Center Park, Hamden, CT